» Proposal
I "popped the question" on January 11, 2014, but our proposal story actually starts several months before... all the way back to November 20.
I knew early on that Nicki was a pretty special individual. From our very first date at Carrabba's we were on the path to becoming best friends, and that's not just some fairytale comment to add on a random website on the Internet! It's true through and through. By November I knew she was the one for me. You see, November 20 is when I officially started my search for the ring.
The Ring
I hit all the major players when it comes to jewelry: Schiffman's, Jared's, Kales, Kays, some local shops, Jason's, and a few others. I knew what I wanted, and I was a man on a mission. I ended up at Jared's on a Friday where I spent a good bit of time talking to Perry Mason (yeah, I didn't make that up). He helped me round out the knowledge I had gained to that point talking with the other jewelers and doing Internet searches on cut, quality, size, etc. After that lengthy discussion he gave me some information and told me to come back the next weekend because they would be running a special event. If I was interested in making a purchase he said I could probably get a better deal then.
I showed up right on queue that next Saturday. It happened that Perry was busy with another customer so Tim Calahaun stepped right in and helped answer a few additional questions. After reviewing several diamonds I found the style I wanted. It was a Tolkowsky round ideal-cut diamond in 3/4 carat size. I toyed with the idea of going larger, but Nicki and I had stoppped by a Kay's Jewelers a few weeks before just for fun where she of course looked at all the rings. She gravitated toward the 3/4 carat ring because the size wasn't so big it looked strange on her hand. I made mental notes then and so a few weeks later I had found it... the perfect stone. I looked at the settings that Jared's had in the store but nothing really "spoke" to me so I purchased the stone and promised to come back and look some more at a later date.
When I left Jared's I had planned to propose to Nicki on Valentine's day. I figured I was starting early enough that if I needed to I could have a custom ring made from scratch to get exactly what I wanted. It took another couple of weeks and several trips back to Jared's to talk with Tim and Perry before I had finally found the perfect setting to go with the perfect stone... all for the perfect woman. The setting I wanted was a double-crossover design similar to one that we saw when Nicki and I went to Kay's weeks before. I drew out the design on a piece of paper for Tim and said, "That's what I want." He took my drawing and said he'd let me know what he could find. He and I went through all the setting books, options, styles, etc.
After another week of looking he called and said he had something for me to come check out. I stopped by after work, and sure enough, he had found a setting that was exactly like the picture I drew for him. As you might imagine I was pretty excited. He said he'd have to order it, and I questioned him about how I could make it extra special. I mean buying a ring is great, but I really wanted it taylor-made for my girl. During the conversation I explained how I was planning to propose. I had the entire process planned out in my head and I think he was pretty impressed. He suggested that I have it engraved. That was it, and I knew exactly what it needed to say. I had it engraved with those three beautiful words "I LOVE YOU" and to top it off Tim had a ruby embedded inside the band to seal the deal. I mean, what more could you say than those three timelessly wonderful words. It sums up my feelings completely.
It took another week or two to have the stone mounted, the engraving completed, and the sizing finished. But when it was done I knew it was perfect. Now I just had to wait for the perfect moment to give it to her.
The Plan and Its Execution
As I mentioned, I had originally planned to wait until Valentine's day to propose. I had already set plans in motion to that end for location, reservations, etc. The only problem was that it was now Christmas and Valentine's Day was still more than a month away, and I'm not good at keeping something like that a secret. Especially not for 2 months.
Over the last few weeks of December Nicki and I discussed marriage several times. I didn't let on that I had the ring, but the whole time I was terrified she'd figure out that I did. It was about a month later that I decided that February was just going to be too long, and there was no way I could keep it a secret until then. At that point I started looking for the right place to pop the question. My son Johnnie and I had talked, and he was just as excited as I was to ask Nicki to be part of our family. It was all up to me now.
I looked at all the normal places. I looked at steak houses like Flemmings, Ruth Chris, Green Valley Grill, and PrintWorks Bistro. I looked at Italian places like Olive Garden and Carrabba's. I figured out the best place would be somewhere that the atmosphere would be intimate and where we could take our time enjoying dinner and conversation (if you don't know, Nicki and I both like to talk a lot). I checked out Tavo's, Crafted, and Liberty Oak which are all in downtown Greensboro. All these were good options, but I wanted to go a bit off the reservation and chose a placed called Cafe Pasta. Cafe Pasta is on State Street in Greensboro and is a quaint, quiet little restaurant that looked to be absolutely perfect. I had never been to Cafe Pasta before so I decided to swing by on a Friday for lunch. When I walked in I knew immediately I had found it. I sat down and had lunch (which was delicious), and I talked to the waitress to get a bit more information about what to expect the following night with regard to how busy they would be, how loud it would get, etc. After I told her my plan she gave me the assurances I needed and that was that.
I told Nicki that I was going to take her out on a date that Saturday. We had been busy with the holidays and family functions for the last few weeks, and we hadn't really had a chance to just date... which of course worked in my favor. I can not explain how nervous I was about the details of that night. I combed my hair probably 10 times, changed my shirt twice, and went back and forth on "should I put the ring in my pocket, the car, a gift box, or something else?" To make matters worse the method I chose to make my proposal required that I take a book with me. How in the world was I supposed to explain my carrying this book into the restaurant without giving it all away. If you know Nicki well then you understand when I say that I could guarantee she would ask "what's that for?" And when she did what was I going to say? ... Nervous? Yeah, you could say that.
When we got to the restaurant I had the ring in my coat pocket (thankfully it was bulky enough you couldn't tell). As we got out of the car I tried to put the book under my coat so she couldn't see it. That, as you might expect, didn't work so with one quick move I slipped it back into the seat and we headed inside.
At this point I was a bit stuck. I had the ring but not the book. The book was a key element to this whole process. What was I going to do? There was nothing I could do but sit down and start dinner. We got appetizers, salad, main course, and I made sure that she saved room for dessert. After each course my heartbeat picked up pace. By the time we got to dessert I thought my heart was going to explode. The conversation that night was very laid back even with all this going on in my head, but Nicki asked a couple of times if everything was okay (probably because I was being quiet trying my best to not give anything away). By dessert the restaurant had pretty much emptied out except for one or two tables. As I took the final bite of the chocolate peanutbutter pie I realized that I just had to make it work. I excused myself from the table to go to the restroom, which luckily was downstairs near the entrance. Instead of going to the restroom I slipped out the door and went to the car to retrieve the book and returned to the table.
I sat down and told Nicki I had something for her.
By now I'm sure you're wondering why the book was important. If I were you I would be too, but there was a reason. If you stop and think about it, had I just handed her a ring-shaped box then the secret would've been out right then and there. My plan was much more devious than that. I wanted to have the moment build into a climatic finale. So, instead of a ring-shaped box, I gave her a book.
What's so special about this book? Great question, I'm glad you asked. The book is a photobook that I made of all the dates, activities, adventures, and moments that Nicki and I had shared since we met. It chronicled the very first date up to shortly before that night that we were sharing at Cafe Pasta. Each page was designed to remind its reader of a special moment and to tell our story. At the end of the book it has in big words "Will you Marry Me?" and a picture of me and the ring. The book also has the added benefit of being a keepsake, and it can be shared with others as Nicki remembers the story of that special night.
Nicki started reading the book starting on page one. (Whew! I was worried she may just flip through it or start at the end and mess up my plan. I really was "all-in" on this high-stakes poker game.) She carefully reviewed each picture and caption before continuing. She had no idea what was about to happen.
Finally the big moment was here. She had arrived on the page before the proposal. That page simply said that the story of us was about to take a twist. I actually saw the puzzlement on her face... until she turned the page. And as she did I waited a moment for her to take it all in and then got up from my chair, went around to her, got on one knee, and said in as clear a voice as I could muster, "Nicki Watkins, will you marry me?"
It took her all of about two seconds to respond with a "Yes".
